Thursday, June 16, 2005

May 9 - June 17

Timeline of Events: (Warning - Harsh Language Due To No Blogging For 5 Weeks)

05/01/05 - My first computer incident. I wrote about it that day. Also the day I spilled root beer on the fridge.

05/07/05 - My second computer incident. This was the last day the power cord stayed in for any significant length of time.

05/09/05 - I smell smoke coming out of my computer. My last blog post, if I recall correctly.

05/10/05 - Fire begins coming out of my computer's power cord area. I quickly smother it. Not cool. I don't touch the computer for the next two days.

3:42 AM: My 19th birthday - Oh, joyous day... yeah - right.
12:30 PM: I get the announcement that the Groton Naval Base, which is not where either of my parents are employed but is responsible for about 90% of the profits both of them make at their jobs, is being shut down.
9:16 PM: My computer once again catches fire and ends up being down to 2% battery power. I try using another person's battery to send my files to myself, but to no avail - I put mine back in.

12:10 AM: The inside of my computer literally explodes, causing no injury, but does cause my heart to beat at the rate of approximately 220 - 230 beats a minute for a short time period (I have supraventral tachycardia, so a beat of 180 to 190 is something I know - but this was insane.) It also wakes up half the floor.
2:45 AM: I receive a mysterious phone call from a girl in Colorado Springs. Perhaps she forgot that I had a final exam in the morning and that it was 2:45.
1:30 PM: My first final exam. I wake up at 1:15, but luck out as complete strangers offer to give me a ride as I am wearing a shirt with the logo of their (and my) favorite pro football team. Yowzers.

05/19/05 - Done with final exams, I await my parents to come pick me up from the University on the 22nd. (Ickle Firsties aren't allowed to have cars on campus, you see) Oh yeah - plus Saddam Hussein in his underwear.

05/22/05 - I am indeed picked up. I arrive back in Connecticut, where it rains the entire way home. When I do arrive home, I find our computer is in disarray. Crap.

05/24/05 - "Gang of 14" reaches Filibuster Compromise. This does nothing to change my position that John McCain is an asshat worthy of winning the newly minted "Prick of the Day" award. No offense to the Coalition of the Chillin' - it's only "Maverick" McCain getting the award today. I wonder if I get to hand out the award tomorrow.

05/25/05 - Just my luck. Amnesty International calls Guantanamo Bay "The Gulag of our times". The Babaganoosh calls Amnesty International "The Pricks of the day". It rains again for the fourth consecutive day.

05/28/05 - It rains again. Seven consecutive days in which it has rained for at least one hour.

05/31/05 - It does not rain. This breaks the streak of nine consecutive days in which it rains (and thunders) for at least one hour - the longest such streak I can recall since Hurricane Bob in 1991 and perhaps longer than that.

06/01/05 - Evil Glenn blends his 616,000th puppy. I don't know what significance this holds, but I'm sure it is something. I also join the local community band for the next month.

06/02/05 - I find out I failed Chemistry. (Failing in the sense that I need a C to pass) and need to take it at the local college in the summer. Class begins third week of July.

06/13/05 - Jackson innocent. 12 "Pricks of the Day" awards handed out. One specifically given to little boy by Jackson himself. Did I say that out loud? And I consider myself an 80's Jackson fan. Sheesh. Jackson celebrates by going to DisneyLand. I did it again.

06/15/05 - The computer begins working again after being to numerous shops. The first thing I do is download Mozilla Firefox. You can't spell asshole without A. O. L. (In case you didn't know that, it's your fact for the day)

06/16/05 - I begin commenting to blogs again (such as Oddybobo's mu nu address), and the Rockies lose again. Then again, I could have added THAT comment to any of these other days. (They're 21-43 now, after being swept by my parents' hometown Indians. Oy vey.)

06/17/05 - I post again, both here and at It's A Pundit. Oh... that's right - I don't post there - only various personae of the good Doctor do. XD

And three for the future:

06/21/05 - My best friend's graduation. I laugh at him for he is still in high school. Ha. Ha. My younger brother is a year younger than him and will be graduating in June 2006. I don't remember when he was born (I wasn't even two), but my parents' sure do, and all his baby pictures are randomly appearing throughout the house. And the grad party? No kegs, honestly.

July 2005: Acidman from Gut Rumbles will piss off one of his readers by stating the obvious, and Laurence Simon from IFOC will say 35 things that my parents find utterly tasteless that I laugh at. Okay, that's a given. I can't believe I lived without those blogs for five weeks.

The Year 2082 - ESPN finally realizes that there are other teams in baseball besides the Red Sox, Yankees, and Cubs. The Cubs still haven't won a world series. (Nor have the Rockies) The Yankees payroll is $14.5 billion dollars, the Red Sox is $14.1 billion, and the third highest is $4 billion. The Red Sox complain about the Yankees buying up all the good players, of course. Whiny socialist SOBs. Ted Kennedy's corpse is re-elected again.

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